We’ve all got tension. We’ve all got time, Friday afternoons are a great example, when the breaking point is reached, and the weekend is ready to open up before us, if we’re fortunate. A time to cut loose, rest, rebuild our love lives and ourselves, and … And then we must be diverted and still find time. Taken point off. Unplugged from our aims, work, strategies, whatever.
I pull on my headset on, engage the noise-canceling boom and function, I’m in a moment of zen in my own family room. Turns out, occasionally, I’m simply appearing to be distracted. Even the good things (ok, the fantastic things) are often nerve-racking.
She's an alternate type of ingenuity. Her’s is for dreaming up what’s next and then making the dream a reality.
And lately there have already been too many things that were good to even list. But I can tell the largest impact has been the girl of my dreams to you. And even in that blissful honeymoon-ish state, I need time to disconnect. I guess we call time is “ed alone by it,” but occasionally it's simply isolation time for me.
Isolation is a thing that is funny. However, if I’m honest, I can see how my social media passion is, in addition, an escape in the present.
I was having a similar discussion with my new time that was significant other about the concepts of backwards and forwards, I first struck in Time and the Art of Living. Here’s my fundamental paraphrase.
1. Present Moment. What we’re all striving to remain focused on – Meditation, Knowledge, Honest conversations, Listening, friendship online, Whatever you want to call it.
2. Ideas about the future.
3. Memories of yesteryear.
You can find times when these two other styles of time can be illuminating and helpful as well while I do think that keeping our attention on the present moment is a really strong tool.
As I was conversing with my girl about the house we're buying next month, and she was working on lots of details. She was measuring the rooms and comparing them with our current house. “Do you understand we’ll have half a foot more width and span in our new house?” she asked. At first I thought over believing it she was, and then I remembered this notion of future time.
When we project ourselves into the future, it can be an excellent exercise. We can start setting aims and thoughts for what we need, what we are getting excited about in the new experience. Creating a framework for the future strategies. I loved hearing about her fantasies regarding the new house, as I leaned with my future wife into the dream.
“We can have romantic evenings in front of the fireplace.” Not to mention, we will. In this very minute, projecting our ideas, we're able to go there together. And absolutely everything, everything could be perfect in our minds. And this projecting that is favorable can have bonding and energizing effects on us. For what needs to be done to create an ideal instant we visualized we can find inspiration and motivation.
And certainly we will live in this new house together. And surely we'll enjoy a glass of wine in front of the hearth. In projecting ourselves into this future perfect moment we are creating an image of reality that we can create. (Did I get too woowoo on you there?) I'd like to provide you with a quote from the publication.
Swift drivers can see no further than motorists that are slow, but they must look farther down the road to time their reactions safely. Likewise, individuals with great projects afoot habitually look further and more clearly into the future than folks who are mired in day to day anxieties. Robert Grudin.
So it's this projection of a terrific undertaking (in this case the house – and perhaps the house of our relationship) that I'm willing to indulge in with my sweet woman. And together we can map out some thoughts about what we should create, not only physically, but emotionally at the same time.
A relationship is a lot such as this. You state notions and visions to see if the other person lights up and resonates. Like a trial balloon.
“Wow, this cold night feels like New York City,” I said, some months past.
“Do you need to go to New York City together?” she asked, clutching my arm against splinters and the wind of mist.
That would be amazing. To walk the roads together. Like this.”